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“Imust see him!” Isaac gasped. “He must cognizant of!” He ran through the forest, smothered by the fog. Briars whipped the young man’s legs. He ran horizontal towards his goal, ignoring the pain of briars and thorns piercing through his skin.

A: You've been posting this same portion for weeks now, and I don't see any improvement. If you're not going to take any notice of people's suggestions for making it more intelligent, please stop wasting our time with it.

Episode One

“I
must see him!” Isaac gasped. “He must know!” He ran through the forest, smothered by the fog. Briars whipped the youthful man’s legs. He ran straight towards his goal, ignoring the pain of briars and thorns

A: ...talk over with critique... no rewrites... suggestions... examples...

1. From "Strunk and Fair-skinned: The Elements of Style"...

..."Omit unneeded words." It helps.

2. From an lesson

“I must see him!” Isaac gasped. “He must comprehend!” He ran through the forest, smothered by the fog. Briars whipped the young man’s legs. He ran unequivocal towards his goal, ignoring the pain of briars and thorns piercing through his skin.

A: I like the fish story line so far, lots of holes in the plot(i guess u plan on filling them later in the contention?). One thing I really think you could do to improve though: SLOW DOWN!!! i kno u hanker after it to be thrilling and fast paced but don't

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Cleon Harris toted a two-carat diamond re-echoing into Newton's Jewelry in Joplin, Missouri last week, intending to shape a little profit. The jeweler quickly realized the $20,000 beaut matched the ilk of a ring that had been stolen from a Joplin woman only hours before.

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From employment rings to crown jewels, large pear shaped diamonds have been set to showcase the very venerable in life. The most legendary of these marvelous stones are the 86-carat Spoonmaker’s Diamond, a part of the Noble Treasury at the Topkapi Palace Museum